Lady Of Grace

...A Work In Progress...

When Jesus spoke again to the people he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." JOHN 8:12

FOR IT IS BY GRACE YOU HAVE BEEN SAVED, THROUGH FAITH - AND THIS NOT FROM YOURSELVES, IT IS THE GIFT OF GOD - NOT BY WORKS, SO THAT NO ONE CAN BOAST. FOR WE ARE GOD'S WORKMANSHIP, CREATED IN CHRIST JESUS TO DO GOOD WORKS, WHICH GOD PREPARED IN ADVANCE FOR US TO DO." EPHESIANS 2:8-10

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Ends... and Beginnings...


It is kind of funny what kinds of things make you take account of your own life. I always have the "I need to do's"... and the "Some day I will's"... running through my mind. It is when life comes to a complete stop... that you realize... that the "Wow... that coulda been me's"... start to rattle around in your heart.

What am I talking about? Glad ya asked... lemme tell ya.

Yesterday at work... I was sitting there during my lunch hour... and a co-worker brought me some unsettling news. News that I could have went without hearing forever. A lady that I have known for about 15 years... was dead. !*@ My mind stopped instantly and was flooded by thoughts of her through the years.

I pray that Connie is resting in the arms of Jesus right now. I pray for strength and peace for her son Fletcher... as he begins his own life... without his mother in it.

Connie used to work with my husband for about 10 years. I even worked with her for several years. My daughter and her son were the same age. They have gone through school together and are in the same grade. Connie raised her son by herself. I am 36 years old and my husband is 41... she was in our age range. To make a long story short... she was in pretty good health... a smoker though. The other day... she had called into work because she wasn't feeling very good. There was no one to take her place... so she went to work to cover her shift. While taking care of one of her residents at the assisted living facility that she worked at... she collapsed. Her life was taken quickly by an unexpected assailant.

She had a heart attack.

Bam! Gone in an instant! No time to prepare your loved ones. No time to get things in order. No time to say "I love you"... just one more time. All the things that I worry about all the time.

Here I sit... in my fat body... with my "going down hill slowly" health... and I sit... and I sit... and I sit. Not doing a damn thing about it! How stupid am I? How cruel I am being to my daughter. How unloving am I being to my husband. How could I ever had thought that... "I will have time to take care of myself... and I won't die prematurely"... HOW STUPID!

Here is Fletcher... working his way through his last semester of high school... gearing up for graduation... doing all the things... that I imagine a young man wants to do to get ready for his life after school... and BAM! His momma dies instantly!

To be perfectly honest... that is my biggest fear. I had a word from God in the shower the other day. (God speaks to me in the bathroom... alot! I consider it our 'conference room') The word that was..."You are not going to see Hannah graduate if you don't do something now." I don't want to miss out on Hannah's life. I don't want to miss Hannah's graduation... or her wedding... or her first child. I don't want her to not have her momma around.

There is only one person in the entire universe that knows what day in our lives will be our last. I believe that God gives us chances... and opportunities... and if we don't take them... to better our lives and who we are... then we will lose out. Actually... it is those who are left behind... that will lose out.

When you live your life... you always expect certain people in your life... to just always be there. It is when they are no longer there... that you realize just how fragile life really is. So much is taken for granted... by others... as well as myself. I always think that there will be "enough time" to do... or to get started doing... all the things I procrastinate about.

What happens if the "enough time" clock stops ticking?

posted by ~Suzii~ at 12:36 PM

4 Comments:

Blogger Shelley L. MacKenzie said...

I'm sorry to hear about your friend.

Our bodies are the Lord's temple. I know I need to clean up mine better.

8:09 PM  
Blogger Bonnie S. Calhoun said...

I'm sorry for the loss of your friend.

You said that this was,"News that you could have went without hearing for ever!" Maybe God is giving you this message as your own wakeup call.

I will pray that you choose to use it wisely!

10:19 PM  
Blogger ............... said...

It's not easy to hear something so awful (for us humans, anyway.) I, too, am sorry for the loss of your friend, Suze, and know that you will, just as Bonnie (above) says, and make good use of the information God is giving you...and me, and anyone else who reads your posts! Time is so short, and there is so much to do. I love you and hope that you are around for a very long time!

6:10 PM  
Blogger Joe said...

We're sorry you lost your friend.

We are here for but a whisp of time, and we don't know how long that is.

A friend of mine says, "Eternal life is the Gift God gives to you. What you do with that life is your gift to Him."

I kinda like that.

8:05 AM  

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Name: ~Suzii~
Location: Elm Grove, West Virginia, United States

I live each day the best I can. I thank God for every tiny little thing that I have. I would like to write the book that is in my heart to write... or should I say... finish it. God sees us at the core of who we are... and He still loves us anyway. He is the reason and purpose I exist in this world... and He has entrusted me with a family to care for... and with a heart to share with others how much He loves everyone. (This is a note to self... "Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the LORD of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it. Malachi 3:10")

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I will call upon the Lord! Who is worthy to be praised! So shall I be saved from my enemies! The Lord liveth and blessed be the Rock! And let the God of my salvation be exalted!
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If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. ~1 Corinthians 13~  

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