Healing Up Distance....

Greetings!... from the Ohio Valley! Sorry it has been so long for me catching up with my blogging. Hopefully soon we will be up and running at home. We actually have DSL internet all set up and ready to go... but our computer hard drive crashed and it is in the computer hospital. We should have it back by the end of the week. Fixing it up was cheaper than buying a whole new computer.

Things are going ok... I guess. I did not go to the interview at the hospital. The lady who scheduled my interview wrote down the wrong time... then she called me to ask me why I was not there. I told her that she had given me a certain time and that I would be there then. She then told me that she had someone else scheduled in that time slot and that I could show up and she might be able to squeeze me in but she wasn't sure.

I have my good, full time+ job as a cake decorator... and now my daughter Hannah works there also in the deli. I know that God has good plans for our lives... but right now I cannot see progress. I feel blessed with a good job... and I am not bragging... but people in these parts usually don't make the wage I was hired at... so I feel very blessed. It has been a long adjustment time though. I drive 53 miles one way to get there. Sometimes we make two trips a day there and back depending on the situation. It gets frustrating having to work just for gas money... at least that's what it seems like lately. I was excited to find a gas station the other day that was only $3.08 for the cheap stuff!

I do know that God has us in his hands. I just have to trust in Him a little more than I do. Sometimes it seems like "the world" bogs me down and I flounder around trying to figure out what to do next. It feels as though I just get up... get dressed... and do it all over again. My time is spend at work and driving... then I eat fast and get showered and back to bed again. I know that most people do the exact same thing in this life. I am not meaning to sound complainy... but when you know there is a greater purpose for you... "patience" is hard to find. Right? Does anyone else feel that way? Like, you know God has more in store for you... and you just seem to be spinnin' yer wheels gettin' there? C'mon... anyone else feel that way? I do.

I am trying every day to find "a happy place" in my heart to get me through each day. I thank God for my family! They are what truly keeps me going. Just being around them... not necessarily doing anything but watching the grass grow in a spare moment is good enough for me! I do what I do because of them... and for them.

Sometimes my happy place is thinking of all of the wonderful memories I have from times gone by. Am I wasting my time thinking about that rather than trying to figure out what my next hurdle is going to be? I am trying to not worry so much anymore. It brings stress... and stress causes people to become older than they really are. It affects their health... their mental state... and it affects those around them.

We were having trouble a while back. It's hard to live with other people. We have all had to really work hard to make living together work. Have you ever had to rely on others for a place to live? It's very humbling... and you learn a new version of respect. We were having... let's just say... "communication" problems with Rich's grandma.... (Nanny). She is an old woman.. very set in her ways. She sometimes stews on things for weeks at a time. Things were getting very tense around the house. No one was speaking to each other. Hannah and I came home the other night from work. Rich's mom's car was gone... and the front door was closed. That was a little different than usual... but we figured she went up town and maybe the door was closed because it was a little windy and chilly that day. No big deal. Then Hannah went down the two front steps of the house and said... "Mom... is that blood on that pile of rags?" And I said... "Yes.... Hannah... that's blood... and a lot of it!" We could hear the dog barking. He was downstairs behind the child gate... and we could hear him all the way outside the front of the house. We managed to get in the house and there were grocery bags strewn all over the sunporch. Dinner was half cooked and had been turned off... and our dog "Sterling" was hoarse from barking so much. He had been put down stairs. No one was home. I managed to find the phone and phone book and called. Rich's mom answered her cell phone finally. Nanny had fallen down the front stairs and landed on the concrete on her head and the right side of her body. She is 84 years old. She is bruised from the top of her head all the way down. She came home the same night from the ER. She hadn't been speaking to us for about two weeks. I leaned over her chair and said... "I would give you a hug... but I don't know where all you are hurt... so I am going to give you a kiss." I gave her a peck on the lips. She held my cheeks when I did it and I looked her straight in the eyes and said... "I love you, you know." She looked me straight in the eyes back and said, "I love you too." Then she started tearing up! So did Rich's mom.... and me of course. Hannah even got a little misty. She told Hannah that she loved her too later on that night.

Since then, the atmosphere around the house has been one of love. There has been laughter... and conversation... and it has been wonderful! It really makes a difference when you are open to communication with those who care about you.

When Nanny was in the hospital... and before we had found out if she was going to be ok or not... I said a little prayer. I said..."Lord... Nanny is in your hands. If it is meant for her life to be with you now... then comfort us all during thins time. If she is meant to be here with us... then heal her up and get her home." Seems he is healing a little more than just her body... he is healing a household!

Do you ever pray to God and just say... "Thank you God... for being you."